Conversations are crucial in various aspects of life. For Entrepreneurs it is particularly important for networking. Simple conversations can lead to new opportunities, collaborations, and personal growth. Unfortunately, however, starting a conversation can seem daunting, particularly when you overthink the process. It’s common to worry about what to say or what’s appropriate, making it difficult to take the first step. However, the key is to start a conversation regardless of your approach. In this article we will learn how to start conversations effectively.
1. Just Start the Conversation
One of the biggest obstacles is overthinking. When you wait too long to start a conversation, you nonverbally set a precedent that speaking isn’t expected. Imagine waiting ten minutes before talking to someone and then trying to come up with a well-thought-out opener. It will feel incongruent with the silent period, making your approach seem fake. First impressions are critical, and research shows that initial perceptions are hard to change. Starting a conversation immediately sets a positive tone and establishes an engaging dynamic from the beginning.
At a networking event, Maria saw a potential business partner standing alone. Instead of overthinking, she walked up, smiled, and said, “Hi, I’m Maria. It’s great to see so many like-minded professionals here.” This simple start led to a fruitful conversation and a new business connection.
At a different networking event, John noticed a key industry leader he wanted to connect with. John hesitated, spending several minutes thinking about the perfect opener. By the time he finally approached, the leader had already been engaged by someone else. When John eventually managed to join the conversation, his rehearsed opener felt out of place and awkward. The opportunity for a genuine connection was missed, and the interaction ended without any meaningful exchange.
Tip: Focus on The Right Things Before Starting a Conversation
At networking events, your first focus should be on the following
- Open Body Language: Use open body language combined with initiating the conversation in the first seven seconds. This makes you appear approachable and friendly.
Smile: Smiling is a powerful tool. Research shows that people who smile are perceived as more positive, trustworthy, and friendly.
Be Well Dressed & Groomed: Being well Dressed and groomed signals positive character traits. While you can’t change your looks, presenting yourself neatly can make a significant difference due to the halo effect, where people attribute positive characteristics to those who are physically attractive. You don’t need to be the best looking but only look presentable.
2. Skip the Small Talk
Avoid standard questions like “How are you doing?” which rarely lead to interesting conversations. Instead, focus on the present and the situation at hand. Here are three tips to skip the small talk:
Be Perceptive
Noticing what the other person is doing and commenting on it shows attentiveness and genuine interest, creating a natural opening for conversation.
Example: you see someone reviewing documents at a conference, you could say, “It looks like you’re really prepared. What are you presenting on?” This demonstrates that you are socially attuned and creates a pathway for them to share more about their work.
Use the Situation
Asking questions related to the current situation helps establish common ground and relevance, making the conversation flow more naturally.
Example: If you notice someone looking at the event’s schedule, you might ask, “Is there a particular session you’re excited about?” This is a natural way to engage and find common interests without being intrusive.
Go Beyond Facts
Moving past surface-level facts to discuss feelings and opinions allows for deeper, more meaningful conversations.
Example: Instead of asking, “What do you do for work?” you could ask, “What do you enjoy most about your work?” or “What inspired you to get into your field?” These questions invite the person to share their motivations and passions, leading to a richer conversation.
At a networking event, Lisa noticed a potential contact looking at a painting on the wall. She walked over and said, “That painting is fascinating. What do you think of it?” This sparked a deep conversation about art and personal tastes.
At the same Even, Tom saw someone sitting alone and decided to approach. He walked over and said, “Hey, how are you doing?” The guest responded with a brief “Good, thanks,” and the conversation quickly stalled. Tom’s standard question didn’t engage the guest, missing an opportunity for a deeper, more interesting conversation.
3. Create “Me Too” Moments
Finding and highlighting similarities with your conversational partner can make interactions more engaging. Here’s how to create these moments:
- Point Out Similarities: When you find common ground, mention it. For example, “Oh, you like hiking too? I just went on a great trail last weekend.”
- Look Deeper Than Differences: Even if you have opposing views, find a broader similarity. If someone supports a rival sports team, focus on the shared love of the sport.
- Compliment Similar Passions: Acknowledge and appreciate shared interests or passions, which can foster a sense of connection and validation.
4. Give Genuine Compliments
Compliments should be sincere and specific. People can tell when you’re being disingenuous. Here are some tips for giving effective compliments:
- Be Genuine: Pay attention to positive traits or actions and mention them.
- Be Original: Avoid obvious compliments. Instead of saying “You look nice,” you could say, “You have a great sense of style.”
- Turn Negatives into Positives: If you notice a negative trait, think about its positive side and compliment that aspect.
5. Use Humor
Humor can break the ice and make conversations more enjoyable. Here’s how to use humor effectively:
- Be Playful: Don’t take things too seriously. A light-hearted approach can make conversations fun.
- Add to Jokes: Build on someone else’s joke to keep the momentum going.
- Self-Deprecation: Joking about yourself can be a safe way to use humor without offending others.
Richard Branson’s Self-Deprecating Humor: Richard Branson, the founder of Virgin Group, is well-known for his use of self-deprecating humor. He often shares stories of his own mistakes and failures, which not only makes him more relatable but also creates an open and honest workplace culture. Branson’s ability to laugh at himself has endeared him to his employees and has been a key factor in building a strong, positive corporate culture
6. Be Present
Pay attention to the person you’re talking to. Don’t get distracted by your phone or other thoughts. Being fully present shows respect and interest, which are crucial for meaningful conversations.
7. Remember Details
Remembering what someone said in previous conversations can make future interactions much smoother and more meaningful. This includes remembering names, children, hobbies, and current activities.
Conclusion
Learning how to start a conversation with anyone doesn’t have to be complicated. By following these tips, you can overcome overthinking, make great first impressions, and engage in meaningful conversations. Whether you’re networking or simply making new friends, these strategies will help you connect with others effectively.
This is a very informative post. The writing style is very nice. I am very happy
Thank you for reading the article! Please let us know if there is anything specific you would like to learn about communication skills or buinsess.